Tuesday, September 27, 2011

This world; full of lies and deceit. Full of hate and fear. The world is scary and you never know what is around the corner. Reality is ...well... a complete and total bitch. People go everyday with nothing while some have everything they ever could want and don't appreciate it one bit. Sometimes ... reality hits you really hard and it isn't an experience that you exactly want to deal with. But I'll tell you what, that point where you get knocked down by a reality kick in the face... All you need to do... is get up.

I've had hard hits in my life...and a lot of them. I've been knocked down holes I never thought I would be able to climb out of. Never thought I could find my way to the surface. And honestly some of the holes I dug myself. And i kept digging because I was so lost on which way was up. I've lost and pushed away people I never wanted to lose. But those hits and falls have made me who I am and have made me a stronger person.

I look back at my life ... and think... Wow, what a mess. There are so many things I wish I would have done. And of course... regrets.
I look at what I have now...and think. Wow, I wouldn't give this up for anything.
I have so many wonderful things in my life. So many amazing people who love me and I love them. And I know this world... has it's beauty.

There are people in my life that i have pushed and shoved...and they stay. It's such a shock still to this moment on why. But I'm so glad I've found them all.

I have Erick Bognar.... who is a father to me and can listen to me and do his best to help through anything.
I have Ginny ... who does her best to help out and tries so hard to point me in the right direction.
I have my family.... who have been there my entire life and have seen the best and the bad but help as much as they can while letting me be an adult.
and of course.
I have Mr. Kenneth Marshall Wolford.... He is the love of my life and the joy of my heart. He is the reason I have the people I have. He is the reason I want to stay strong. And the reason I believe in Love and a wonderful world. He has stayed with me and been with me through the worst of me. And has enjoyed nothing more than my happy times with him. Him wanting to marry me is the best Honor I could receive. And to grow old with him is better than a dream....

life is good.
and ...
i love it.

 I don't know why This came up. But i decided to write about it.

i love you to the moon and back

Stay Strong.

and Remember.

it's not only where you are from...but what you make of it.

love always
Jordyn Victoria McAdams (Wolford) [ ; ) <3 ]

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The love for not only a Sister but a Friend (rip sam)

This is for her.
Always remembered and NEVER forgotten or out of our hearts
You and I were so much alike. and i love you so much
Remeber the 3 hour long conversation about nothing.
about how we were not crazy....but CRAZEY
cuz crazey wasn't a bad thing it made us fun and who we are.
I'm really going to miss those.
But they will never leave my memory
I only got to really talk to you for a year.
Why are you alreast gone is something i'll never understand
But now you are with Daddy.
I hope you are happy and peaceful
i know you are.
So know that as I cry.
It's tears of sadness from missing you
But also tears of joy from memories of what i will always have
A loving sister who will always be watching over me


blessed be sam

  your sis

Thursday, June 16, 2011

A Father's Day story.

I was 4 years old when my Daddy passed away. Poems and letters were written in memory of him and a tattoo on my shoulder with his ashes in the outline. Every year father's day was just another day to sign a card someone else bought for my now ex-step father. It was never a happy day for me while i cried and wondered why he was taken away from me. Every year on December 7th was also very difficult(his death date). The December of 2010 was different. I woke up and tuned on my iHome that was on shuffle. The first song that came on was Go by Boys Like Girls. A song about letting go and moving on with your life.I cried tears of sadness and joy that morning. I felt as if my dad was sending me that song as a messege. This weekend is Father's Day and I wear a necklace with his ashes inside around my neck. So he knows he is not forgot and is always loved.
the story continues...
I believe that when someone dies they give their love they have for you to other people that will come into your life so you are not alone.
I began dating a boy named Kenny Wolford on may 27th 2010 . And i know my dad gave him that love. But not only he got the love. His family also received it.
Kenny's father Erick Bognar has been so wonderful and cares so much for me. I am honored to tell the world he is so much like a father to me. Blood doesn't make a family. Love does. and Erick is my Dad. I hope he agrees. And I hope he considers me like a daughter.



Thursday, April 21, 2011

27th of May

My heart
and the pieces
Inbetween lived that were being lived and that wanted to be real
                                     that feeling
                                     the pain
                                     the fear
that was cried over the years
But you
      a person who had always crossed my mind
                                                          my thoughts
                                                          my dreams
and as crazy as this seems

               it was always you

picking up pieces
and just as if I was a toddler's puzzel
there was me
but me was now we
I was no longer alone
No more pain from this game
many more tears have fallen...

For joy
For smiles
For love
                 This love you show
                        The love you give


                                                                  Since the 27th of May.

april 20th 2011

©Jordyn McAdams

[ this poem is dedicated to my one and only Kenny. it's more of a freestyle poem and those are alittle harder for me to do at times. So I imagine myself in a huge poetry slam with the lights dimmed and the powerful emotion coming from each poet's creation]
{let me know if you like it.}

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Hello Everyone.

I have decided to start a personal blog because my friend Erick had recommended it since he has a blog. I love to write poetry so I'm sure a lot of that will be on here. So here it goes... lets try this out and see how it turns out.

; ]